Do You Really Shave Your Toes?

February 25, 2009

I was going to write something about Barry’s speech last night but just couldn’t muster the strength. I also considered writing about the fact that every time the camera panned to someone in the audience, they looked like they died maybe 10 years ago. (Seriously people, could we stop re-electing people that drool and wear Depends?)

Instead of politics, I want to revisit personal grooming. Not manscaping; that subject has already been addressed. No, I want to talk about the relentless pursuit of women to be “hair free”. To be honest, I have been married for over 20 years so body hair fashion is not something I am terribly in tune with. And by the way, I am ok with this.

The other day a colleague mentioned that she was fantasizing thinking about me while she was shaving her legs. A funny little story until she also pointed out she shaved her toes. Are you kidding me? My journalistic radar immediately went into full coverage mode. Within a few hours, I had asked pretty much each of the 6 women I know if they do the same thing. 5 of 6 said yes!

This body hair thing has gotten completely out of control. Men getting their “boys” a haircut…woman shaving their toes. What is going on? As I considered this issue, I thought back to the cover photo of Bar Rafaeli. In the photo, she is virtually hairless. We know that since she is from Israel, that she is naturally covered in body hair. So, I would say it probably takes her about 3 hours a day to get hair free. Is this really worth it? (I only spend an hour on my butt each day¬†and that is to reduce dingleberries. A real medical reason).

Then, in what can only be described as divine intervention, I found a website that posts full magazines on-line. I have been going through a muscle car phase (middle aged crisis) and saw that they also had Penthouse on-line. I haven’t seen a Penthouse since the 80’s issue that had Wade Boggs and his lover Margo something. (In fact, I probably still have that issue somewhere).

So, as a journalist, I open the digital magazine. Can you guess what I saw? That’s right…no less than 8 models that were virtually hairless. Most had shaved everything including their hoo-hoo’s. The only exception was one or two that had what I can only describe as a sideways Inspector Clouseau mustache. What is the point of that? Since this is a PG blog, here is what I am talking about.

hoo-hoo-stache

I’m sorry, but that is just weird.

Anyway, I thought this important news item should be shared with you. I hope I was able to enlighten the masses. We have a real crisis here and you people need to do something about it. You are welcome. TL