Occupy Wall Street Or Twilight: Breaking Dawn?

November 16, 2011

Since I am boycotting Black Friday because it has now been moved to Thursday, I have some extra time to stand around somewhere. The two obvious choices are to Occupy Wall Street (OWS) or stand in line for the premier of the new Twilight movie.

I think an occupation sounds much longer than standing in line but I am told the lines to these Twilight movies are ridiculous. From a “save the world” point of view, OWS just barely beats out killer vampires and all of the other Satanic stuff that comes with Twilight. Are blood sucking corporations any less dangerous than the Twilight devil people? I think not. But, I don’t literally have to go to Wall Street to protest. I can just make a small sign and wave it from my couch. It is the thought that counts people.

However, standing in line with a bunch of Satan worshippers sounds like a lot of fun too. I hear that one of the characters is named Bela after Bela Lugosi. I love those old movies! Plus there is a werewolf and a guy with a scar in the shape of a lightening bolt on his head. Frankenstein? Could be. Just sounds like a lot of fun to me. I hope the fact that I haven’t seen any of the first six movies doesn’t matter. Maybe my new friends in line will fill me in on the details.

Still, the OWS group is older and more likely to be high. They seem to be a lot like Juggalos and lord knows I love those crazy people. They will show you their boobs for $1 or less! Where else can you get that except at a strip club or under the overpass on MLK Blvd? (See photo below for proof). Plus, there is always the threat of police brutality which makes for awesome YouTube videos.

What guy doesn’t love a girl with big boobs that can’t spell? To be fair, I bet if I look for hot Twilight women, there will be plenty of them as well.

Wait…wha…??? I didn’t know Twilight had gone all Brokeback Mountain. When the hell did this happen? Not that I am against this sort of thing but I doubt Bela Lugosi would approve. (Although the guy on the right does have some sexy sideburns). FYI, if they are going to go in this direction, they should at least be sharing some tongue.

Well, it’s settled. I am not going to attend either event. The truth is, the battery in my Rascal Scooter would not last long enough to get me where I am going. Plus, I am sure someone would have something snarky to say about me going commando. You kids have fun.


Music Group Responsible For Teen Death?

December 22, 2008

When I first read the headline, I thought for sure it had finally happened…the Jonas Brothers had finally pushed someone over the edge and caused them to whack somebody. Unfortunately I was wrong.

No, the latest group to be accused of influencing the behavior of idiotic teenagers is Insane Clown Posse. Now, I am not a listener of ICP, but I have seen them on TV in their full clown regalia. Pretty silly looking to me in the same way that KISS was silly looking in the 70’s.

However, even without hearing the first verse of their music, I can say unequivocally, they are not responsible for the death of Matthew Silliman.


You see the 4 idiots to the left of Matthew’s photo? They are the reason that he is dead…all by themselves. For some reason, which probably seemed really, really cool at the time, they read Matt his fortune using Tarot cards. (Of course, since they already knew his fate, this seems like a fairly pointless step).

They then proceeded to pound the young man in the head with a hammer and then suffocate him with duct tape. The article refers to the 4 imbeciles as “his friends”. Really? Under what possible scenario would you refer to people that murder you as “friends”?

It’s good to see that Sherriff Fife and company are hot on the trail of the ICP connection. That is a hot lead that should really get them some great results. Unless of course, it turns out that the 4 a**hats lured Matthew into their little club and killed him out of sheer boredom and ignorance. It’s too bad that it appears Matt felt compelled to join these idiots just to get some  “friendship” tossed his way.

My guess is that 1 of the 4 is the “brains” behind the operation and the other idiots just got caught up in a terrible situation. Something tells me that these 4 are desperately lacking an education and/or parental guidance. As usual, this is where the blame belongs. Of course, by the time you reach 17 or 18, even that excuse is pretty flimsy.

My hope is that those that were directly involved are prosecuted to the maximum extent the law allows. Nothing good can come out of this but there should be a clear message sent that lame excuses will not curry favor with the court. Again, if it were the Jonas Brothers, I might feel differently. I could definitely see how they could drive someone to murder.

Sherriff Fife – If no one admits to being the “mastermind”, blame it on the kid named Asdil Shaaid Kahn…that should quiet the angry crowd. “I knew it had to be that dammed Muslim sum-a-bitch!”