Obama Bringing Back Clinton Cronies.

November 10, 2008

What happened to all of the “change” that was supposed to happen? First, Rahm Emanuel and now John Podesta are added to the “new” team. Soon we will be reading that George Stephanopoulos is back in the gang. The only Clinton crony I would be ok seeing is Janet Reno. Mmmm….Janet. What man doesn’t tingle for her?





When I was envisioning Barry’s new team, I thought it would truly be “new” people. Not just a bunch of rehashed Washington insiders who play politics for a living. We have gone that route many times and it always results in the same old policies and political bickering


I have already mentioned that Chuck Norris should be the Secretary of Defense. Here are some of my other choices.


Secretary of State – Pam Beasley from “The Office”. She is an awesome secretary plus she is hot in that “I don’t know I’m hot” way.


Department of the Interior – Flava Flav. Have you seen his house on Cribs? Flav knows how to put an interior together. Plus, free clocks for everyone! (Although you do have to wear them around your neck).


Homeland Security Chief. – Hannibal Lecter. I don’t know where he is hanging these days but I know that no one would ever mess with him, or us. Fava beans indeed.


Department of Health – Snoop Dog. He is in good shape, lean and knows every drug ever created. Plus, he does not seem to be a Bogart.


EPA – No one is better in protecting the environment than Aquaman. He can talk to the fishes plus has the ability to walk on land. He is also good friends with all of the other Super Heroes and doesn’t have the crappy attitude of say, Batman. (Yeah Bruce, we get it. You are full of angst. Enough already)


Token Republican appointment – Sarah Palin. Really, was there ever any doubt? Her main job will be to buy clothes and look good. (Barry might need to impose a slight tax increase…her stuff isn’t cheap) Plus, she can keep talking about hockey moms, pigs with lipstick, ACORN, etc. and I get to keep the tissue makers in the black. Did I mention she is still a Maverick?


So there is my list, Barry. Obviously, it is way better than yours so if you need to steal some of my selections, feel free to do so. And no, my gay friends, I did not ignore you. I will have a new department. The “Back Door” Negotiation Team. It will be headed up by one of our most famous and popular gays, George Clooney.


Sorry Joe “the Di**head” Plumber. No job for you on Barry’s team. Oh, and pay your damned taxes!


If you would like to add to my list, please feel free to do so.




Hey! Sarah Palin Isn’t The Only Babe. What About The Dems?

October 13, 2008

I was sent an e-mail this weekend suggesting that maybe i was showing the Republican ladies a little too much love. (Thanks BD). The gist of the message was that the Democrats also have some very attractive women on their side of the aisle as well. Fair enough.

Here, in a completely unbiased comparison, we will look at some Republican and Democratic ladies. Obviously, when it comes to Republican women, Sarah and Cindy are at the top of the list.


Granted, these two might be perceived as “hot”. But, to be fair, let’s show some equal love to the Dems. Here our a few of the contenders:


Hey now! Who says that all of the beauty resides on the Republican side? And here is my all time personal favorite:

Mmmm…Janet Reno. If you are a man and are not chopping wood, you need to see a doctor.

So, as you can see, the Democrats are equally represented when it comes to natural beauty. I am not sure but I believe Ms. Albright was also in several beauty contests and regularly won the “most likely to wear a wig” category. Something I am sure she is still very proud of to this day.

So, to my Democratic friends, my apologies for ignoring these handsome ladies. Obviously, they don’t need me to support them because their beauty is the stuff that inspires artists around the world. Sure, Sarah is what men would refer to as a 5 star MILf / VPILF. However, Hillary and Janet would not be ignored by us guys…they would be referred to as “2 baggers”. (Actually, Janet would deserve the very rare “3 bagger” title). If you are not familiar with these titles, trust me, they are good!

I hope you can see I have been fair and balanced in my comparison. Why? Because I am now, and will always be, a people person.

NSFS!!! (I am heading off to the bathroom with my Janet Reno photo album now. Have a nice day).