Do You Hate All Blacks Or Just Obama?

As an occasional black man, I need to know this so I can understand just how many of you racist peckerwoods are out there. With so few of you even trying to hide it anymore, the number has grown substantially.

How do I know this? Because the arguments against Barry have grown increasingly ridiculous. I thought that the “birthers” were probably as bad as it could get but I was wrong. Someone, somewhere posted that Barry is making over $85 million off of the BP disaster through his Vanguard accounts. As near as I can tell, he has about $300k invested. I am not a math major, but the ROI on that seems slightly high. (Although I am sure other Vanguard holders are praying to God the numbers are right).

This is just one example of how anything that is said or written about our Black King is readily digested as the truth by the racist masses. You can say you hate Barry for his policies or lack of actions (of which there are many gaffes to choose from) but it goes well beyond that. You hate him because he can’t bowl like a white man. You hate him because he has purple lips. You hate him because of his tiny ears. Let’s just call a spade a spade…you hate the black man.

But here is the thing. He has given you two extra years of unemployment checks. He has hooked you up with health care. He offered to take your shitty, rusted, El Camino filled with empty Lone Star beer cans in the back, and let you trade up to a newer pick up. He even tried to get you to move out of the trailer park and buy a house without wheels on it. In short, he has given you racist douche bags everything you want except the ability; still, to marry your first cousin legally.

Don’t get me wrong. I have all kinds of problems with Barry. His no-limit credit card spending, his failure to do a damned thing about the wars, his desire to be all things to all people, his entire staff being “insiders”, etc. The list goes on and on. But none of it has to do with him or his heritage. Who cares? It’s not like he’s a Jew or something.

I realize that the only thing worse than having a black man as POTUS is having a Mexican but that day is coming too (although we better never have a woman President…unless it’s Sarah). The truth is, it doesn’t matter what color the big man is. He is accountable to the movers and shakers of the world; not you.

Politicians have a choice. To either hang out with people loaded with cash and access (think Wall Street), or you, Joe Donut (the constituent). Who the hell do you think they are going to cater to? And wouldn’t you do the same thing? So, stop hating on the black man and dreaming that whitey is going to be your friend. He isn’t…unless you have the cash flow to capture his attention.

Now, go back to spending your time on chasing down Bigfoot and “browsing” at the local Wal-Mart. Oh, and keep an eye out for the black helicopters you delusional, paranoid, racist, ass hats.

(Do you even need to ask whether I would hit this or not?)

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15 Responses to Do You Hate All Blacks Or Just Obama?

  1. davehambo says:

    Satire of the highest quality boss! Where has “she” put the burger to keep it warm?

  2. Bearman says:

    No I don’t have to ask. You know you like the princesses.

  3. Laura says:

    Speak it loud brother!!!

  4. nonnie9999 says:

    i’m confused. is she trying to cool her boobs off, or is she trying to melt the ice in her soda?

  5. elizabeth3hersh says:

    Damn, all those years of subterfuge with beer cans (in my handbag, fake hairspray cans, in your linen closet)…I had surgically enhanced mammary cup holders and didn’t properly utilize those babies. Bummed.

  6. I just don’t like him because he sucks at his job, which granted, lots of people do, but he thinks he’s doing great, and that it’s the American public that has their priorities all effed-up.

    It’s one thing to lead a nation. It’s another to lead them in the opposite direction of where they wanted to go all the while telling them condescendingly that if they were just a little less stupid they’d see that this is actually where they wanted to head.

    • steve says:

      Most of the lefties here are fixated on the ‘large’ woman. Stands to reason … it’s easier to look at pictures than read (gasp!)

      “Birthers”! that always cracks me up, as that label comes from those known as “after-birthers”.

      • tannerleah says:

        First, steve, I am ambidextrous. Second, of course I am fixated on the fat chick…look at the size of her boobs!

        Good to see CLT has found someone that shares his vision of the world.

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