Since I get all of my medical advice from the Interweb, I thought I would seek some help on an ever worsening condition I am suffering from. Essentially, it is chronic fatigue. I am just simply tired almost all of the time.
I know I am not narcoleptic because Fundamental Jelly posted pictures of this disease on his site and I have not fallen on the ground in a department store or next to my trash can. I have done the “head nod” now and then but never blacked out.
I am pretty sure I don’t have rickets or scurvy although I have not eliminated sickle cell anemia or the avian flu. Whatever I have just keeps me sluggish all day and has me in bed early every night. When you are the kind of sex machine that I am, this is just not an acceptable lifestyle.
I have considered my lifestyle and see no clues there. I walk a fair amount each day, (from my home to my car, car to the office, office to car, car to home) so I seriously doubt exercise is an issue. That is some serious cardio.
My diet is sound. I eat, at least 1 piece of fruit a day with several diet Cokes, copious amounts of meat, and anything containing fructose is going to certainly command my attention. Surely the carb loading I do each day should give me energy, no?
My mental health is sound. I get home from work and seek the darkest parts of my home to embrace solitude. I do not socialize so there is no risk of communicable diseases. In short, I am damned near a social butterfly. (Not the adult butterfly flying all over the place…more like the part when it is in its cocoon).
So, as you can see, I have almost everything in my favor from a physical and mental health standpoint. Still, I am freakin’ wiped out! My doctor has prescribed me a variety of narcotics to deal with this but still refuses to bring out the heavy hitters like crack and heroine. He is worried about his career or something and is afraid to take chances.
I am at my wit’s end on this matter. So I turn to you, my dear friends, to offer me solemn words of advice. I am looking for something slightly more than “pray to Jesus”. (Sorry Art). If you can solve this House-like mystery, I will forever be in your debt. (Literally…as in I am never going to pay you so don’t be looking for any cash).
Yours in exhaustion, TL.