Letterman Is A Fornicator And The IOC Is Racist

What a horrible day to be American. One of our greatest citizens, David Letterman, is caught banging the secretary and another great citizen, Oprah, is told “oh hell no” for Chicago and the Olympics. 

First, let me address the Dave situation. Doesn’t CBS have an HR department? Surely they have a policy that says the boss cannot sleep with the underlings. Every company has this policy. Either Dave ignored the policy, not likely, or they are just running one big fornicating factory over at CBS. I bet Jeff Probst is probably banging the Survivor girls and maybe a few of the better looking guys. 

The fact that one of the girls he slept with is 30 years his junior is not an issue for me. In fact, I commend Dave, who is otherwise not a handsome man, for being able to snag a halfway decent looking employee. He doesn’t have to be embarrassed like Bill Clinton and answer the, “You slept with that?”, questions. (For the record, I think technically his cigar slept with that woman, Miss Lewinsky). 

There is some question as to whether Dave was already with a steady mate at the time of his philandering. Who cares? He is a celebrity. Celebrities don’t have to abide by the same rules as the rest of us mere mortals. If Sarah Palin, for instance, wants to have sex with me (and she does) it is ok because she is a celebrity. Sure, it is not ok for me because I am not but I am hoping my wife will be in an understanding mood that day. 

As for the International Olympic Committee, what a joke they are. We send Michelle and Barack, plus Oprah, and they still shoot us down. Of course they did. They are a bunch of non-bathing, cigar smoking, fat, poopy faced, racist, foreigners. They never had any intention of giving us the Olympics. It will go to one of those Spanish speaking countries because, as we all know, the Mexicans basically rule the world these days. (And don’t kid yourself; Spain and Brazil are just like Mexico…nothing but tacos and sombreros). 

This will also make the terrorists happy because the airline tickets are cheaper to these other countries. Plus, their brown skin will fit right in. As I have mentioned before, if they would only shave those goat beards they would be completely unrecognizable in a crowd. That wouldn’t have happened in Chicago where they would have been surrounded by pasty white or charcoal black, fat men and women. You would be able to spot those skinny terrorists bastards from a mile away. 

EDIT: I see that the Olympics were awarded to Rio de Janeiro. Looks at these lunatics. They wear balloons on their heads for Christ’s sake. WTF?

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38 Responses to Letterman Is A Fornicator And The IOC Is Racist

  1. sandysays1 says:

    Hummm, My human shrugged his shoulders and said, “Actually, the IOC committee was kidknapped by some angry old white men from the South who normally dress in white sheets. They used elaborate disguises to fool each other. They exposed themselves when they started to announced their vote preceded by ‘ya all’. I think I saw some of them at a Town Hall Meeting. If you believe that Sandy I’ve got ocean front property to sell you in Wyoming.”

    http://www.sandysays1.wordpress.com

  2. nonnie9999 says:

    i blame michael phathead steele. he started his outreach to latinos, and the ioc bought into it.

  3. I can’t believe Rio got it either! I’m pretty sure that’s in Canada, and Canada seems to be a little too cold to host the Summer Games?

    F^ckin Canadians.

  4. hoboduke says:

    The Olympic bid by Chicago would have had a better shot with Mike Ditka instead of Oprah. Da Coach has more personality, and he would have spent all night drinking with the Olympic Committee until they were under the table. That my friend is how Chicago is fun.
    Dave Letterman has asked Elliot Spitzer to be his guest so they can whine about their weakness for women on TV. Elliot paid for his naughty fun and went to classy joints, but Letterman is so cheap he wouldn’t even pay to keep his name from being trampled in mud. Maybe Letterman wasn’t kidding when he had a sex fantasy about Sarah Palin’s youngest teenager just into puberty.
    I’ll be on the road to Rio for fun in the sun!

    • tannerleah says:

      You would think that with all of the dough Dave has, he could have at least hired some lookers to be on his staff. You are correct…Spitzer is a much better fornicator.

  5. elizabeth3hersh says:

    If I were in Rio, I would be dancing the samba too at Copacabana Beach. Felicitações Rio!! Your time has come!! You deserve it!

  6. TL, when are you running for office? If you added Sarah Palin as a running mate (in whatever way you want to interpret that..)you could take some votes.

    • tannerleah says:

      Good question Pamela. Sadly, with all of the skeletons in my closet (some not so hidden), I could only run as a Republican in Alabama or Arkansas. I have no desire to reside in either place.

  7. Tannerleah, we’ve ran across each other on many a friendly blog, so I thought I’d come over and have a tall glass of vodka. Your photo suggests that you are a bit like me in the drinking, smoking, gambling, womanizing, fighting, swearing, and writing departments. I am not disappointed.

    I do agree that Jeff Probst is probably banging anything with a pulse in the wilds of Survivorworld. He has those shifty eyes and that dickish demeanor after all. I also agree about Dave. Letterman gets laid because of his humor and it works every time. This is a vindication for every funny, but fugly, guy on the planet. They are still celebrating.

    I have to tell you though; you are wrong about one thing. I’ve lived in Spain for a year and a half, and I still unfortunately haven’t seen a taco. I did a post last week on the reasons to go back and the reasons to stay. Other than free tapas with every drink, food was always on the reasons to go back side. Nowhere else in the world can you find such an amazing variety.

    Great blog!

    • tannerleah says:

      Welcome Scott, great to have you visit.

      I am confused as to the taco issue but since I have never been out of the county I was born in, I may have been mistaken.

      However, now that I know you can get free ta-ta’s with food in Spain, I am saving up my money to move there. Free ta-ta’s? Maybe there really is a God.

  8. yorksnbeans says:

    Comment.

    That’s it for me on this post. (I have to keep up my reputation for always saying something, even if it’s meaningless, which it probably always is anyway.)

  9. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I agree with you. Dave is just not a good looking man and those women slept with him because he’s a celebrity. Even unattractive celebrities can nail people a third of their age.

    • tannerleah says:

      Claire, have you lost your mind? Agreeing with me? Hell hath truly frozen over.

      What you say is true. Now that I am a famous blogger, I get propositioned on pretty much a regular basis. Sure, it’s mostly by creepy, cross dressing men but, still, I enjoy the attention.

  10. Great post, Tanner. Excellent double-header, so to speak.

    RE: Dave – I can think of no better way to handle a potential blackmailing than yanking the rug out from under “Plan A,” which leaves the blackmailer pretty much out of plans from “B” to “Z.” Nothing like exposing yourself in public. If no else can appreciate that, surely you can, Tanner.

    RE: IOC – I think Obama’s self-aggrandizing and tiresome “walking on water” condescension have already started to wear thin with our neighbors in the world, even if it seems to be taking a little longer from the bloom to fall here at home.

    Maybe that’s because we’re (and by we, I mean certain unions) are benefitting from some big jumps in protectionist policy and several new punitive import tariffs, like the levy against Chinese tires that the US tire industry didn’t even want. That one, for some reason, was issued to placate the US Steelworker unions.

    Maybe the IOC decided that the US would be better off playing with itself since it seems to have no urge to share or play well with others.

  11. Even if you omit those who made speeches to the IOC – the presentations were horrible. Based on the video no one should have voted for Chicago. Bad for Obama – he is the biggest loser. I loved CNN’s reaction because for days they were touting a Chicago win. I guess not.

  12. Ivan says:

    Hey… Tannerleah… come over here in 2014 for the Soccer World Cup and stay over for 2016 Olympics… you’ll be treated well and may have a little problem deciding to leave… 😛

    We’re fucking poor, I know, but we know how to live a life!

    Greetings from Brazil!

    Ivan.

    • tannerleah says:

      Thank you for the offer Ivan, and welcome.

      I would love to visit but I don’t usually like to leave my trailer park. Here, I can be small minded and just hate on everyone. If I actually travelled the globe, I might find that everyone is not trying to call a Jihad on me. Then I would have to sell my guns and probably go gay.

      See my problem?

      • Ivan says:

        Yeah.. I see your problem. Seems big to me. But, there’s til some time left for you to reconsider. If u decide to come, let me know. I can show you some shortcuts.

        Ivan.

  13. Ivan says:

    Man.. by reading you at Bschooled and Don Mills… I NEVER, NEVER, NEEEEEEEVER could expect you to be one of those who moderate comments… come on Tann dont let me down!! hehe

    All the best,

    Ivan.

    • tannerleah says:

      I only moderate the first comment because I don’t like the people that come in and a) sell stuff or b) disagree with me. It’s like arguing with Jesus. Who needs it?

      You sir, however, are welcomed with open arms! (Although not in a gay way).

    • Ivan says:

      Not in a gay way… I can handle that. And I promise you I won’t annoy you any more than this. I’ll try to follow your stuff up here.

      All the best,

      Ivan.

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