Hallelujah! Michael Vick Is Cured!

I have to be honest; I have been worrying about Mike these last two years. I was worrying because I thought that the minute he was released from jail, he would go right back into the dog fighting business. 

In fact, I thought he would be belligerent and defiant. I worried that he would hide it enough to stay out of jail but, if you read between the lines, you could see that he was back to business as usual. 

How wrong I was. I watched Mike in an interview on 60 Minutes last night and, it turns out, the “old” Mike Vick died somewhere in prison. He admitted to crying at night and finding Jesus again. (Ah…the ever elusive Jesus. Only to be found when you are in jail or suffering some out of the ordinary crisis). 

He not only abhors dog fighting these days, he is working with the ASPCA to teach children that dog fighting is wrong. He now realizes that when he and his minions killed, maimed, and tortured any number of dogs, it was wrong. He couldn’t quite see it at the time, but prison opened up a window into his soul. 

This is really a happy story. Like so many in society that abuse the weak and go to prison, he is now “cured”. Whatever wiring that was crossed in the first place has since been fixed. The Philadelphia Eagles, in a beautiful effort to support his redemption, even signed him to a multi-million dollar contract. Not because they put football first and said to hell with morals and ethics, no, simply because it was the right thing to do. 

Philly fans have been rushing to buy Mike’s number 7 jersey so they can also join the redemption express. The City of Brotherly Love truly is living up to its name. I can only hope that animal lovers can find it in their collective hearts to be equally forgiving. 

Sure, cynics among you may think that Mike has the intellect of a retarded mouse, but that’s just because you are racist. You may think that his high priced legal team was pulling the strings as his lips moved during the interview but, again, you are just hating on the black man. You may wonder how a guy that filed bankruptcy can afford such a team. Look past his color, people!

Welcome back, Mike. I take you at your word and am willing to give you another chance. In fact, if you can help the NFL increase its ratings, I would be happy to give you several more chances. Maybe you can even team up with Chris Brown and go on an “I’m sorry” tour. That would be awesome. Much love, my brother, much love.

Michael Vick says hi


24 Responses to Hallelujah! Michael Vick Is Cured!

  1. davis says:

    “the ever-elusive Jesus” would be GREAT in the wildcat offense, don’t you think?

  2. yorksnbeans says:

    Atlanta says “good riddance”!

  3. Can I let my dogs out to pee now?

  4. Sarah says:

    Excuse me while I vomit.

  5. elizabeth3hersh says:

    I’m not buying into it either, no siree Bob. Why does Mick Vick remind me of Mike Tyson?

  6. Sweats Model says:

    Say on, Brother T-Leah! Spoken like a true, ocassional black man.

  7. nonnie9999 says:

    i was completely buying what michael vick was saying during the 60 minutes interview until he started reading off his hand and asking the interviewer to move his head so he could see the cue cards his lawyers and p.r. people were holding. that said, i’m sure he was sincere.

  8. I’m sure he can feel the animal’s pain now. Oh sorry. I meant he SHOULD feel the animal’s pain now.

  9. elizabeth3hersh says:

    BTW TL, I’m really glad you’re back (and in fine form)!

  10. Donovan McNabb is wondering to himself…”Am I really that bad?”

  11. What better place for the brotha to end up than the City of Brotherly Love?

  12. womaninblack says:

    Dog fighting – isn’t that what planes did over the sea in WW2?
    Sorry, I am stuck in the 1940s again; if it happens again, I will call Michael J Fox.

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