Obama Hates Retards

March 20, 2009

At least that is what I am being told by my republican friends. It would seem that Barry was talking about his bowling skills, or lack thereof, and compared his average to what a contestant from the Special Olympics might score. 

While this might be offensive to some, it is also an outright lie. Many short bus riders are excellent bowlers. Hell, Corky carries like a 210 average. Granted, he is not super retarded but he definitely has “challenges”. 

The truth is I have seen the Special Olympics and most of the athletes competing would kick my a** in just about any event. However, when they do win, they don’t act all douche like. They actually congratulate each other and share the joy of winning with others. 

If Terrell Owens were a retard, the NFL would be a much better place. I think we can say that about most things in life. In fact, I would rather have our mentally challenged people in charge in Washington. Not because they are deep thinkers or will solve the worlds problems in a day but because at least they will be honest. They will look at me with that innocent face and say, “Sorry TL. We are going to have to fu** you now but we will try to make it painless”. 

And why the hell was Barry on Leno in the first place. Doesn’t he have more pressing issues to attend to? The POTUS should be above that kind of stuff. My Oz, how much more TV exposure does the guy need anyway? Will we see him do a guest shot on 30 Rock next week? Maybe he can talk to some of the camera guys from TMZ…that would be titillating. 

I for one don’t think that he meant any harm in his Special Olympics comment. Of course, we as a society, have nothing better to do than to jump on any little PC moment. If Jay wasn’t such a pussy, he would have said something like, “Mr. President, you sure do bowl like a colored person”. Would that have been offensive? Not to me. Or he could have said, “You bowl about as well as you swim”. Again, nothing offensive there. 

To those of you that are retarded, white, black, brown, short, tall, fat, skinny, china-man, or whatever, I apologize for my lack of political correctness. Feel free to hate me for it; then get over it. I am not worthy of your ire. Keep it focused on Barry. He started it. 

And by the way, stop all of the hating on short buses. Some of them are nicer than anything you will ever own.


Time To Kick Back On Friday With Bob…

March 20, 2009

This ends early but don’t let that stop you from searching out some more Bob. Enjoy that blunt.

By the way, no one ever won the “make my wife smile” contest. Why? Because no one entered. This pleases me immensely because it means you felt like she already has the greatest life of all time. How right you are.