Should You Go To Jail For Killing Birds?

That was my first thought when I read the headline, “Seven arrested in bird massacre”. I thought that these 7 were probably poor rednecks who needed food and that trumped any concern they might have for the birds.

Boy, was I wrong. These 7 absolutely deserved to be arrested and I hope they are significantly fined for their ridiculous behavior. Let me introduce you to the “Bird Killing 7”.






That’s right. Turns out these 7 were just spoiled rich kid douche bags. Mato looks especially douchey and needs to have a good a** whippin’ put on him. Shaughnessy really needs to look into buying some new shades. And Meads, apparently the token whore in the group, should really find a better group of friends. C’mon Ms. Meads. You are a pretty girl (although you should dial back on the eyeliner). You can do better than these monkeys. (No, I am not making an Obama reference).

Here is the damage that these idiots caused.


Now, I am not a PETA guy nor do I have some soft spot for birds. In fact, except for animals I eat on a regular basis, I am not too concerned about the subject of animals at all. Still, this is just ridiculous. This just reeks of spoiled rotten children that have no regard for anything other than themselves.

I don’t think we call these idiots yuppies anymore, so what are they? I know they are douche bags but is there some sort of generational term that should be applied to them? I am sure someone will fill me in.

I would like to see the Magnificent Seven pay a substantial fine and then be sentenced to 30 days of cleaning up bird sh** in whatever city they live in. If they don’t have bird droppings, they can work in an animal shelter and clean the cages. I would really prefer they be a** raped by some big dudes in jail but that’s just because that dumba** grin on the Matos kid bugs me.

Are these the kids that will lead the next generation? Awesome. I might as well just die now so I don’t have to endure the stupidity. This just strengthens the case that we should let more hard working immigrants into this country before the entire concept of work is completely lost.

Maybe instead of yuppies they should be called “Hiltons”. This group looks suspiciously like the type of people that would hang with Paris. “Ooh…you killed a bunch of ugly birds…that’s hot”.

I am going to get drunk right now.


17 Responses to Should You Go To Jail For Killing Birds?

  1. Doug says:

    I just don’t understand this kind of idiocy. Who kills a living being just for the “fun” of it? Hopefully the federal laws protecting some of these species of bird include heavy penalties, fines and jail time.


  2. pobept says:

    These people are not kids doing stupid kid things. They are adults and should face the maximum jail and fines for their killing spree.
    It’s one thing to kill birds to feed your family, it’s another to kill birds simply for the sake of killing!

    I hope all of the suffer the maximum punishment allowable by law for these crimes.

  3. womaninblack says:

    I overload on vowels and suddenly you’re subtracting consonants? You, sir(e), are bang out of order.

  4. Anonymous says:

    What’s even more disappointing is that four of the seven just graduated from the U.S. Naval Academy. Wow.

  5. anchorman says:

    While I agree that they broke laws and that they should face some sort of punishment for it, I don’t think they should go to jail. Maybe some fines would do, or community service. They’re birds for crying out loud. You people are acting like they ran over a group of school children and sped away. And the four that are in the military, at least they are fighting for something real. Yeah I would be worried if our future military leaders cared as much as you did about birds. Come on people get a grip!

    • tannerleah says:

      anchorman – While I agree that some of the responses have been a little harsh, these idiots should suffer a significant penalty. Whether that includes jail time will be up to a judge.

      The very point you make is why they should be held to a higher standard. By all accounts, these are bright young people with huge upside. For them to willfully ignore the law and kill protected wildlife is disconcerting…particularly considering they will potentially be military leaders. Judgment, respect of the law, and maturity are just a few prerequisites for excellent leadership. They displayed none of that.

      In the end, they will get a slap on the wrist. However, I hope they learned an important lesson and are better for it. (And, yes, I was also in the military and did some incredibly stupid stuff. I also took the punishment that came with my immature actions).

  6. Bandt_Bandt says:

    THEY ARE BIRDS!! I believe these people are probably good people and deserve a fine for making a STUPID mistake… probably due to the fact that they had a week off from walking on egg shells for 4 years at the military academy… YES they should have found a different means of entertainment. But DO NOT crucify these people… they will get a fine as deserved but you people are awful for getting so involved when REAL CRIMES are happening all over the world. EI, Human massacres… get the picture?

    • tannerleah says:

      Bandt – You say “they are birds” like birds are nothing. Let me tell you a little story. I was hiking several years ago when I fell from a cliff. I was severely injured and all of my teeth got knocked out. (They have since grown back). A blue heron, who I had not previously met, started checking on me every 30 minutes or so. We soon developed a bond. That bird, understanding and FEELING my pain, chewed up food for me and spit it into my mouth.

      This went on for about 3 months until I was able to crawl out of the canyon. I owe that bird my life.

      And where is that blue heron today? Dead, thanks to the 7 douche bags you want to defend. Check and mate. TL.

  7. anchorman says:

    ok thats a stretch.

  8. anchorman says:

    heard that the fed charges were dropped

  9. Brad says:

    You are ridiculous. Know all of the facts before going off on a rant. The girl and one of the guys (I think mato) took the others out to an island that was only recently turned into a wildlife preserve. Before that it had been owned by an older gentleman who allowed people to go out there and shoot. Oh, and you know what’s funny, the charges were dropped and most of the ones in the navy stayed in. Only a couple of the people actually shot birds, the rest were just out there shooting targets and clay pigeons.

  10. Mark says:

    now this clown cullen shaughnessy is a realtor for respected Premier properties on Marco Island ! What a joke do these companies do any background checks on people they hire now I will pull my listing from Premier properties

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