When Will I Get My Mortgage Bailout Check?

I am sorry; I should have said “mortgage mitigation” check. Sounds much less welfare like, doesn’t it? Will I get it tomorrow? In a month? A year? Never? Bingo! I think I just landed on the correct answer.

Last year, 2.3 million homes were foreclosed on. So, if the number stays about the same this year, we can “give” each of these homeowners $21,739 each. Do you think that is enough? Maybe we should “give” them more…maybe 100 billion instead of 50. That way, they can have some leftover money and take a nice vacation. After all, they have been through a lot.

Since, the above is clearly not going to happen, where the hell is all of this money going? To the banks? Why in the world should they get a dime? To me, a bad loan is equivalent to loaning family members money. You know you are never going to get repaid so, in essence, you are just giving them the money. That’s exactly what the banks did so, as Michael would say, they can suck it.

The homeowners are not going to see anything close to $21k a household. So I ask again, where is all of this money going to go? Let me guess. It will go to banks so they can “do the right thing”. As we have seen with the various stimulus packages already out there, corporations take these handouts incentives seriously. So, we definitely can trust them to do the right thing. Whew…I feel better knowing that competent people are in charge of this mess.

Here is the problem. For every hard working family where the primary bread winner has lost their job, there are 3 homeowners who cashed in on the no money down, ridiculous ARM loan, crazy days of everyone gets a house. For the guy, or gal, that lost their job, I have no problem with them getting help. For the rest, they are SUPPOSED to lose their house! That is exactly how high risk mortgages are supposed to work. If you come up snake eyes, oh well. Pack your El Camino, take down your bed sheet curtains, and get the hell out. 

Wow TL, kind of being harsh, aren’t you? No, not at all. I can tell you from personal experience that when you can’t make a rent payment, this is exactly what happens to you. You and your family get thrown out on your collective a**es. I can’t remember EVER getting bailed out when we were getting kicked to the curb. Was it the landlords fault that we didn’t pay our bills? No. We had no one to blame but ourselves. But an important lesson is learned. You either get your crap together or pick out a lovely box to live in on the corner of MLK Blvd and Highway 42.

Dammit Barry! Put your check book away and let these things resolve themselves. We will all be better off for it in the long run. If you can’t help yourself, I expect my mortgage mitigation check pronto.


6 Responses to When Will I Get My Mortgage Bailout Check?

  1. Nigel Tomm says:

    I’m Nigel Tomm and I agree with you in 100%.

  2. art vandelay says:

    True dat!

  3. Doug says:

    Hilarious! You brought back memories of Chris Rock’s rant about lazy brothas.

    “I take care of my kids.” You’re SUPPOSED to, you dumb motherfu%!*r!

    “I ain’t never been to jail!” What do you want, a cookie?! You’re not SUPPOSED to go to jail, you low-expectation-having motherfu$#@r!

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